If your baby is waking multiple times each night, it can feel overwhelming and exhausting. While it’s natural to want to “fix” the problem immediately, what you do in those quiet, sleepy moments actually matters more than you may realize.
The goal during night wakings isn’t to solve everything right then and there, but to keep your baby calm, sleepy, and unstimulated so they can drift back to sleep as smoothly as possible. Helping your baby learn to settle in these moments lays the foundation for longer, more restful sleep stretches over time.
Here are 7 important things to avoid during night wakings, along with tips to help your baby settle quickly and peacefully.
1. Turning on bright lights
Bright lights tell your baby that it’s time to wake up and be alert. Instead, keep the room as dark as possible. Darkness encourages melatonin production—the hormone that helps your baby feel sleepy. If you need a light to see, opt for a dim red or amber nightlight. Avoid using phone flashlights or bright overheads, as these can make your baby fully awake and more resistant to going back to sleep.
2. Talking too much or too playfully
It’s tempting to soothe with lots of talking or playful sounds (believe me, I understand the urge). But nighttime interactions should be quiet and calm. Use a low, gentle voice if you speak at all. This helps communicate to your baby that it’s still time for rest, not for socializing. Soft shushing or gentle humming can also be very soothing.
3. Rushing in immediately
It’s natural to react quickly when you hear your baby wake up, but sometimes babies make sounds or stir briefly between sleep cycles and settle back on their own. Try to pause for 30 to 60 seconds before entering the room. This small pause gives your baby the chance to self-soothe without extra intervention.
4. Changing diapers unnecessarily
Unless there’s a mess or leakage, avoid changing diapers during the night. The cold temperature and disruption of the diaper change can fully wake your baby and make it harder for them to fall back asleep. If the diaper is dry, it’s best to leave it be until morning.
5. Defaulting straight to feeding
Night feedings are important for newborns, but not every nighttime waking means your baby needs milk. If your baby recently had a feed, try using calming techniques first. Sometimes your baby just needs comfort, not food. Offering milk right away can reinforce the idea that waking up always leads to feeding, which can increase night waking frequency.
6. Picking your baby up right away
While it’s natural to want to hold your baby to soothe them, begin with gentle reassurance in the crib first. Try softly stroking your baby or gentle shushing. This can help your baby feel safe and reassure them without fully waking them up. Only pick your baby up if they don’t settle with this gentle comfort.
7. Getting overwhelmed
Your baby can actually sense your emotional energy. When you’re anxious or stressed, it can make settling harder. Take a deep breath and remind yourself that it’s okay. Your calm presence will help your baby feel safe and supported, making it easier for them to relax and fall back asleep.
Why These Small Changes Matter
Implementing these gentle adjustments won’t necessarily make your baby stop waking up instantly, but they encourage healthier sleep patterns over time. Night wakings are a normal part of infant development, and how you respond plays a key role in teaching your baby to settle independently.
Need More Support?
Night wakings impact your whole family, and it’s okay to ask for help. If you’re ready for personalized guidance, I offer private discovery calls calls where we can assess and come up with the best option for your family. Together, we’ll map out exactly what to do starting to get you better rest.
Remember, better nights are possible—you just need the right strategies to get there.
